December 2012
1 post
November 2012
1 post
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I haven’t posted in ages. But, earlier this week I was at a writing workshop and figured I’d throw the results up here. The instructor had us write about a half-a-page about an insignificant event that happened within the past 24 hours. The sort of event we’d forget about:
Insignificant Event #1
I’m hungry. This isn’t odd, it’s lunchtime. I pull into the...
September 2012
2 posts
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Being a self-centered bastard, I don't ususally...
Today’s xkcd comic.
In one fell swoop, xkcd won the internet.
Click and Drag
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The heck?
I just refreshed my dash, and all of a sudden Tumblr is different.
August 2012
4 posts
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Random thought.
Every time I click the “Like” button on Tumblr and the number flicks from “42” to “43” I feel like I’ve committed a crime.
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reblorg:
Take this transparent png, use it to create something in your favorite image editor, then upload it as a photo reply here. Creators of our five favorites by noon Tuesday will receive a prize pack of Tumblr goodies.
If you post your creation, be sure to tag it #reblorg.
July 2012
3 posts
5 tags
The Waltz of Everyday
This is a short sketch I wrote after reading John Green and David Levithan’s Will Grayson, Will Grayson, which has one of the better fictional portrayals of depression that I’ve read.
Ricky stand in front of the mirror. The strange image stares back. Feelings of self-loathing and a desperate mind-clogging sense of hate floods his mind, causing his inner-dialogue to spazz out,...
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A continuation of assholery
Monads scratch at Lebanese thinkcrocks. Signifying with significance unparalleled by the signs of the lusty Queen that princes observe unseen, every thought a Peter Pan fantasy.
Shocked by a modicum of royal elegance— dresses swishing and top-caps tipping, a farce of pithy facades presenting the expected. The dragons in the basement ignored, but never forgot.
-By Jacob Gehman
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Commemorating my return from the dead with a...
Rickety bedspreads usurp Panama’s cagey claptrap, fountains flipping pancakes and gusts— over and under, precipitation of the blusts.
Blanket residue lingers on eyedew liddrops, classass wonderment at the descriptor’s tainted affair— a parched perthink of blatant curmudgeonly.
Padded barcell, perchance future foretell, listless godspell, Little, miniature examples of...
May 2012
10 posts
3 tags
Well, that didn't last long...
I was really enjoying the whole “instagram” thing, but horror of horrors, my iDevice has disappeared without a trace, so I am now without an Instragraming photo-capable dohickey.
Life.
(Cue withering sigh.)
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Maurice Sendak
I don’t think it is too horribly out of line to say that Maurice Sendak had a fairly big influence on my childhood. I suppose most people cite Where The Wild Things Are—and rightly so. But what I consumed perhaps most frequently and connected with most intimately were the Little Bear books.
Written by Else Holmelund Minarik, Sendak was merely the illustrator. “Merely”....
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And now for something completely different...
…Instagram flash fiction!
If I can figure out how to post directly to Tumblr.
Been using Instagram a lot lately. And even though it makes me feel a bit morally reprehensible (I’m old-school film-and-darkroom elitist when it comes to art photography), I know I’m not going to be using film ever again just because I don’t own an enlarger (I refuse to let some Walmart develop...
March 2012
2 posts
5 tags
Some flash fiction.
If anyone read my last post it was about my current focus on twitter-sized flash-fiction. I generally do anywhere between 0 and 4 flashes a day—little bursts while I brainfart at work. Here is a sampling of some highlights (as picked and curated by me):
1) “I believe I can fly…” warbles the contestant. Judges nod, the audience screams. God disapproves and flings...
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Hello, World.
I’ve been giving Twitter flash-fiction love. I figure some of y’all who like my writing and have twitter might want a heads-up.
my handle: @SirTheory
the tag I use for ‘em: #140characterstory
I may collect some of them for Tumblr posts at some point… but for now these are twitter-exclusive bursts of flashery.
February 2012
4 posts
2 tags
Sigh.
I haven’t been writing much lately. Too much tired and stress. Hence the dearth of posts lately.
If you need a fix, check out my new film review blog at moviesaut.tumblr.com
Sorry for the semi-spam.
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I Squeaked
Residue in my mind Speaks of yesterday, another time I sit on wooden panels Fidgeting the whole damn time Speaking of yesterday, another time I repeat my role in the plot Fidgeting the whole damn time Pointing my finger at the guilty I repeat my role in the plot Signing my death warrant at the same time Pointing my finger at the guilty Licking my lips, begging for time Signing my death warrant at...
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quick note, or something.
If you like film/movies feel free to check out the film-related blog I just started, moviesaut.tumblr.com
I think it’ll be pretty awesome, even though there is only 1 post (probably two in about 5 minutes) so far.
The general intention is to do a blurb about every movie I watch. Nothing too intense or long… I don’t have the brain power these days to write a blog-post thesis.
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A View From My Room, pt. 15
Yikes, sorry about the long delay. Sometimes I just go through…moods. You know?
View 27: Silver
Silver and gold have I none, To quote the Bible quoting Jesus, (Or something like that) But I do have several pennies Which are made out of America’s Finest copper, and whatever other metals The government felt like throwing in.
But since these pennies aren’t in my pocket,...
January 2012
1 post
1 tag
Quick update
Wow, the holidays! I hope everyone following me had a brilliant Christmas/New Year season. I obviously got absolutely NO posting done during that general span. So that should pick right back up……..after today. I’m too lazy to type anything up. Hut hut!
See all’y’all tomorrow!
December 2011
24 posts
4 tags
View From My Room pt.14
View 26: The Ancient Quilt
I should probably get it hanged— The quilt is old and probably an antique. It lies—crumpled—on my floor in a corner.
My grandma had quilts, and lots of them. Some she made, some older than that, And some from unknown sources.
And so, last Thanksgiving, she had us all Pick out one for keeps. RIght away I spotted The one I wanted. It was just a great...
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View From My Room pt.13
View 24: The Window
The curve in my wall creates the need for A deep gash in my wall so that There can be a window in my wall.
It’s like the cutout in a mountain so a Bypass can stretch across the land.
View 25: The Butterfly
How old these walls are I do not know. I’ve only been housed within them for five meager months. These walls have seen more than I care to know And...
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The Act of Figuring Out One's Popularity
I wrote this a week ago when my roommate threw a Christmas get-together. I haven’t posted anything for a few days, so figure at least I can throw something timely on the ol’ tumblr.
Oh how lovely, It’s the required yearly Christmas party. The tree decked in proper Shimmer and shine and Candy-cane intertwines. Hot cider is on the stove, And Hershey Kisses in a glass bowl, The...
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36 Views of My Room, pt.12
A quick note before the poem—those who have been following me (bless you all) may have noticed a titling discrepancy between these Views Of… poems. That has simply been laziness on my part. The official title of the series is “36 Views of My Room”, regardless of what the header title actually ends up being. That said…
View 23: Rotating Blades
It started, I suppose,...
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View of My Room pt.11
View 22: Dusty Love
A guitar (12-string acoustic), guitar (6-string acoustic), banjo (5-string variety), and an old-school mountain dulcimer stand along the far wall—all beloved instruments I have an affinity for.
All standing wholly neglected because, well, It is hard to play an instrument when there are So many movies to watch and So many Facebook statuses to like, And still somehow...
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a lament
I’m a big Harry Potter fan—both books and movies, and even Pottermore. It is a world I love escaping to—for reasons thousands, nay, millions of people have outlined about the series.
As a writer I’d love to craft a world in which people want to escape to.
But I have my own writing style—one which really only works in short bursts. I have next to no skill at...
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View of My Room pt.10
View 21: The Mistake
Nose-deep in my dirty laundry, Spot was not under my bed. How he got there is a mystery not worth the ink.
How sad.
View 22: The Radiators
I used to watch UFOs from my bedroom’s window ledge, Which was just large enough for my 8-year-old body to rest Comfortably and just gaze at the night sky.
Right in front of the window was one of those old Standing radiators with...
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36 Views of My Room pt.9
View 20: Still Life
Remember taking art classes in high school? Remember finding clumps of vases and bottles and fruit Sitting on the tables, ready for some student to try and Accurately reflect them on canvas?
I have my own still-life arrangements just begging for an artist. One arrangement could be called “Sharpie-Pen-Painkiller”, All randomly set-down such that even Van Gogh would...
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View of My Room pt.8
View 19: Subject Headings
They stand regal and dignified On my table with piles of 1980s Baseball cards and paper plates that Once supported sandwiches.
A set of five larger-than-textbook tomes Nestled into their own cardboard box home.
They are nothing more than a detailed list Of the Library of Congress subject heading. Not exactly high on anyone’s list to read.
Yet I picked them up...
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View of My Room pt.7
View 18: The Hole
For the first time in my life I used a hammer With anything resembling productivity. And with that hammer I drove a nail. And with that nail I hung a dartboard.
That was a brilliant idea.
It was a terribly brilliant idea—until I started throwing darts.
“Thud!” went the dart. And suddenly I had two holes in my wall.
By Jacob Gehman
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View of My Room pt.6
Aaaand back to zombies. Which is weird because I kind of don’t like the whole zombie craze that has sprung up.
View 16: Days
I changed my calendar today. Not because it is December 1st (although it is) But because I just noticed I hadn’t flipped it since summer.
It’s a shame, really, because September’s picture Is that of a Victorian-era man shooting a zombie’s...
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36 Views of My Room pt.5
With all that zombie crap out of the way, I can get back to these poems all’y’all love so much…
View 15: Sashaying Lights
I used to never see them. The only light that would enter my room Was that of alien spaceships.
I would watch them from a window seat when I couldn’t sleep.
But we moved from nowhere to somewhere and all of a sudden my room would get bathed in light...
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Zombie'Pocalypse (pt. 3--final!, tentative title)
It took me three days to be able to go back to the house and actually go inside. The living room was chaos. The TV was broken on the floor. The blu-ray player was gone, as were the couch and rocking chair. Blood stained the floor, tracked in—I hoped—by the shoes of the SWAT team. Anything valuable had been carted off by looters, but I wasn’t looking for things of monetary value....
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Painting Pavement
The stop light is red. Cars fly across my windshield. Even a red truck. Car idles, eyes dart. Hear a Porche revving. Rev in return, Let’s race. Snicker, snort, wait for green. Car jittery, anxious. Cops eating in a cafe. Rev, rev, here’s the green! Tires turn pavement— Cars leap into action. People stand on sidewalks. Watch. Listen. Feel. Vibrations—metal on metal, Straining...
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Zombie'Pocalypse (pt. 2, tentative title)
So I just finished hell-week at work. It isn’t officially titled “Hell Week”, because that would turn away customers—but just because it isn’t called that doesn’t make it true. I’m so ready to collapse. But first… MOAR ZOMBIES!!11!11!!!!!
The second I stepped onto Market St. I started wishing I was from Baltimore. I realized that I did not want to...
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Zombie'Pocalypse (pt.1, tentative title)
I like what I have written so far, as a neat little scenario with some neat concepts. I’m not sure, though, if it stands on its own as-is, or if it needs something more. I estimate I’ve posted about 1/4th of what I have written. Though it’ll probably only take two more posts to finish it—I just reached a great finishing point.
The zombie apocalypse was….hell.
Mass...
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36 Views of My Room, pt. 4
View 12: The Up-Step
I have four doors on my floor. One separates my bedroom from my living room. Two belong to large closets where I store anything and Everything except clothes—I have piles for those. And one belongs to a small closet Where some ancient contraption stands.
This small closet door has no window panes, Just holes where they should go.
The windows themselves are ridiculous...
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36 Views of My Room, pt. 3
View 9: From Outer Space
Debris in my mind? More like in my room. Here a pile, there a pile. A sock, a baseball. A guitar pick the same color as my carpet. Brown.
Food in boxes like Dr. Seuss foxes. In and out and all about. Cans rolling and bags floating. Cranberry sauce and meat sauce And spaghetti I’m not sure I can cook.
View 10: Sheep
Sideways? Not quite. The bed tilts, sure. But it...
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36 Views of My Room, pt. 2
View 6: The Grime
The snow in Moscow is so cold, I can feel it falling here. The light outside my window Shows the desperate dash of flakes downward In nature’s own suicide pact. But maybe it is only the grime on my window pane Sparkling when I shift my head.
View 7: The Leaning Tower
Pisa has one popular tourist attraction that leans. My room has six, or more. Most are perilous piles of...
